Going to the Core of Anger Management and Getting Rid of Your Anger

A lot of anger management techniques focus strictly on coping with the anger and allowing it to flow away more softly rather than exploding in your face. That is a valid and helpful approach for the most part. However, if you really want to get rid of your anger, you can’t get stuck at the “management” aspect of it. You have to go deeper and get to the core of the problem.

First of all, if you’re dealing with anger only in specific situations – which is normally what happens – you have to find your triggers. What gets you really angry, and what are you thinking about in those moments? Answering these questions will give you a clue as to the origin of your anger.

Now, it’s important to remember that situations are NOT the source of our anger. Our reactions to them are. Typically, if you get mad because your house was robbed, it’s not the actual robbery that was the source of the anger in the first place. It was your thought process, as you linked the situation with its consequences on you personally that fueled that strong feeling of anger.

So, after you use anger management techniques like screaming into a pillow, taking deep breaths, exercising or expressing your anger to calm down, consider your thought process and how you could change it to change your reactions when the triggers of your anger arise again. With practice, and the support from an excellent anger management Denver therapist, you can learn to disarm those triggers before they even start to affect you.